Question from Margaret Holloway, Decatur, Illinois: “I’ve been using the same shampoo and conditioner for years, but lately my hair feels drier and more brittle than ever. My stylist mentioned something about checking ingredients, but I honestly don’t even know what I’m looking for. Are there certain things in hair products that could actually be making things worse as I get older?”
Margaret, you’re not overthinking it. A lot of people feel this way too, because this comes up in my chair probably three times a week. There’s this assumption that if a product worked for you in your forties, it should still be working now, but hair changes pretty significantly as we get older, and the things that were fine for a younger, oilier scalp can be genuinely damaging to hair that’s already dealing with hormonal shifts, thinning, and a slower growth cycle.
Here’s what I’ve noticed over the years behind the chair: most of my clients over sixty are not doing anything dramatically wrong. They’re not overprocessing or heat styling every single day. What’s actually happening is that the products sitting in their shower have ingredients that made sense for a different version of their hair, and nobody ever told them to look twice at the label. I had one client, a woman named Carol who had the most beautiful silver hair, and she was using a volumizing shampoo she’d loved for decades. It wasn’t until we looked at the ingredients together that we figured out it was stripping what little moisture she had left. Once we swapped it out, her hair completely changed within a month.
So let’s go through the actual culprits, the ones I tell my clients to look for, flip the bottle around, and put back on the shelf.
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7. Sulfates (Especially Sodium Lauryl Sulfate)
Sodium lauryl sulfate, or SLS, is the one I usually start with because it’s in so many products and it’s responsible for that rich, satisfying lather that most people associate with “clean.” The problem is that lather has nothing to do with how clean your hair actually gets. SLS is a surfactant, meaning it grabs oil and washes it away, which sounds great until you realize that as we age, our scalp produces significantly less sebum than it used to. That natural oil isn’t the enemy anymore. At sixty-five, it’s actually your hair’s best friend, and a sulfate shampoo is just washing it straight down the drain every time you shower.
I’ve had clients tell me they shampoo daily because their hair feels greasy otherwise, and when I look at their ends, they’re bone dry with visible breakage. That cycle of stripping and overproducing is something sulfates can create, though to be fair, for older women with lower oil production, what usually happens is the opposite. The scalp just gets drier and drier, the hair gets brittle, and no amount of conditioner seems to fix it because the shampoo is undoing everything before you even get to that step.
What I recommend instead is looking for sulfate-free formulas. Pureology Hydrate Shampoo is one I genuinely love for color-treated hair because it cleans without stripping, and Olaplex No. 4 Bond Maintenance Shampoo is another one I keep recommending because it actually supports the hair structure rather than compromising it. The lather will feel different at first. Less foamy. Some clients hate that adjustment period. But give it six weeks and come back and tell me your hair doesn’t feel better, because I will be genuinely surprised.
6. Alcohols (The Drying Kind)
This one is tricky because not all alcohols are bad for your hair, and I want to be clear about that before you start throwing out everything in your bathroom with “alcohol” on the label. There are fatty alcohols like cetyl alcohol and cetearyl alcohol that are actually moisturizing and beneficial, especially in conditioners. The ones you want to avoid are the short-chain alcohols: isopropyl alcohol, SD alcohol, alcohol denat, and propanol. These are the drying ones, the ones that evaporate quickly and take moisture with them, and they show up most often in hairsprays, mousse, and some styling gels.
For women whose hair is already on the finer or more fragile side, these alcohols can make the cuticle rough and porous over time, which means hair that looks dull, tangles more easily, and breaks when you try to brush it out. I had a client a few years back who was convinced her hair was falling out, and she was genuinely scared about it. When we went through everything she was using, she had a finishing spray she used every single morning that was loaded with SD alcohol. Switching that out made a pretty meaningful difference within a few weeks.
The frustrating part is that these ingredients are often what give products their quick-dry, non-sticky feel, so they’re not easy to replace from a formulation standpoint. But there are good alternatives. Kenra Platinum Silkening Mist is one I keep in my kit and recommend often, and if you need hold without the drying effect, Got2b Phenomenal Thickening Spray is alcohol-free and works well for fine, aging hair that needs a little body without getting crispy.
5. Formaldehyde and Formaldehyde-Releasing Preservatives
Okay, I know “formaldehyde” sounds alarming, and honestly, it should at least get your attention, though I want to talk about this one without sending you into a panic spiral. Formaldehyde itself is rarely listed outright on a product label, but it’s released over time by a group of preservatives that are extremely common in shampoos, conditioners, and styling products. The names to watch for are DMDM hydantoin, diazolidinyl urea, imidazolidinyl urea, quaternium-15, and bronopol. If you see any of those on a label, that product is releasing low levels of formaldehyde as a preservation method.
There are lawsuits happening right now, as of when I’m writing this, against major hair product companies over formaldehyde-releasing ingredients, particularly related to some keratin smoothing treatments. The research on long-term exposure is still evolving, but given that we’re talking about products you’re applying repeatedly, close to your scalp, I think the cautious approach makes a lot of sense. And for older women specifically, whose scalp barrier can be thinner and more permeable, it’s worth taking seriously.
I’ll also add that some of these preservatives can cause scalp irritation, itching, and contact dermatitis, which I’ve seen firsthand. A client of mine had been dealing with a chronically itchy scalp for two years, had seen a dermatologist twice, tried medicated shampoos, the whole thing. We finally tracked it to DMDM hydantoin in her conditioner. Within a month of switching to a cleaner formula, the itching was almost completely gone. Look for products that use alternative preservation systems. Acure Organics Shampoo is an affordable option that avoids these preservatives entirely.
4. Silicones (Certain Ones, Used Daily)
Silicones are a complicated conversation and I want to be honest with you: I don’t think silicones are universally evil, and I get a little tired of the total anti-silicone messaging because it’s not that simple. What silicones do is coat the hair shaft and create a smoothing effect, which can look beautiful and make hair feel soft and manageable. The issue for older, finer hair is that the heavier, non-water-soluble silicones, things like dimethicone, cyclopentasiloxane, and amodimethicone, build up on the hair over time and eventually make it feel heavy, limp, and weirdly coated.
For women dealing with hair that’s lost some density or thickness, silicone buildup is particularly frustrating because it weighs the hair down right at the roots, which is already the most vulnerable area. You end up with hair that looks flat by noon no matter what you do in the morning. And because buildup happens gradually, most people don’t connect it to the product. They just think their hair “got worse.”
What I usually suggest is rotating your products so you’re not using heavy silicone formulas every single day, and doing a clarifying treatment once or twice a month to clear the slate. Neutrogena Anti-Residue Clarifying Shampoo is one of the cheapest and most effective options I’ve found for this, and it does exactly what it says. If you want a silicone-free daily option, Briogeo Don’t Despair, Repair Conditioner is lovely for mature hair that needs moisture without the coating effect.
3. Synthetic Fragrances
The word “fragrance” on a label is basically a legal black box, and I mean that seriously. Because fragrance formulas are considered trade secrets, companies are not required to disclose what’s actually inside that ingredient. It could be dozens or even hundreds of individual chemicals, including known allergens, hormone disruptors, and sensitizers. This matters for everyone, but it matters more as you get older, when your scalp’s barrier function is changing, when you may be on medications that increase skin sensitivity, and when hormonal shifts have already made your scalp more reactive than it used to be.
I’ve noticed over the years that scalp sensitivity complaints peak in my clients who are post-menopausal, and fragrance is often somewhere in the mix. Redness, flaking that isn’t dandruff, a tight or itchy feeling after washing, these can all be fragrance reactions, and they’re often misread as something else entirely. There’s also a growing body of research linking synthetic fragrance components to endocrine disruption, which is particularly relevant during and after menopause when hormonal balance is already a concern.
Fragrance-free doesn’t have to mean your hair care smells like nothing pleasant, either. Some naturally derived scents from essential oils can be beautiful and are far more transparent in terms of what you’re getting. Free & Clear Shampoo is the one I recommend most often to clients with sensitive scalps because it’s gentle, effective, and truly fragrance-free. And Aveda Scalp Solutions Shampoo uses plant-based fragrance that’s disclosed and much gentler if you want something that still has a scent.
2. Parabens
Parabens are preservatives, specifically methylparaben, propylparaben, butylparaben, and ethylparaben, and they’ve been the center of a lot of debate in the beauty industry for the past fifteen or so years. The concern is that they’re xenoestrogens, meaning they can mimic estrogen in the body. For women who are post-menopausal, navigating hormone-sensitive health concerns, or simply paying attention to their overall hormonal health, this is worth knowing. The research isn’t conclusive in every direction, but parabens have been found in breast tissue, and that fact alone has been enough to shift a lot of formulations in the industry.
From a hair health standpoint specifically, parabens can also contribute to scalp irritation and have been associated with color fading in chemically treated hair, which is a more immediately noticeable problem for a lot of my clients. And honestly, at this point there are so many good paraben-free products on the market that there’s really no reason to keep using ones that contain them. It’s one of those situations where the risk-to-benefit ratio just doesn’t favor keeping them in your routine.
I want to mention that “paraben-free” labeling has become so common that it’s almost meaningless as a marketing claim without looking at what the brand uses instead. Some replacement preservatives are actually more irritating. So look at the whole label, not just the front. Paul Mitchell Tea Tree Special Shampoo is a longtime favorite of mine that’s paraben-free and has the added benefit of soothing an irritated scalp, and TRESemmé Pro Pure is a drugstore option that’s accessible and affordable for anyone who wants to make the switch without spending a lot.
1. Mineral Oil and Petrolatum (in Moisturizing Products)
This is the one I feel most strongly about, and I’ll tell you why. Mineral oil and petrolatum are petroleum-derived ingredients that show up in a lot of products marketed specifically toward dry, damaged, and mature hair. They’re in serums, masks, hot oil treatments, some conditioners, and plenty of the “intense moisture” products that are aimed directly at the demographic that needs to avoid them most. The reason they’re used is that they’re cheap, shelf-stable, and they make hair feel smooth immediately after application. The feeling is real. The moisture is not.
What mineral oil and petrolatum do is create a film on the hair shaft and scalp that blocks moisture from getting in or out. For a younger scalp producing plenty of its own oil, this can sometimes be managed. For aging hair that’s already struggling to retain moisture, you’re essentially sealing in dryness and calling it a treatment. I’ve seen clients spend real money on products with “argan oil” in big letters on the front, only to find mineral oil as the second or third ingredient on the back, which means it’s present in a much higher concentration than the actual argan oil they thought they were buying.
The scalp absorption piece concerns me too. Your scalp is skin, and it absorbs what you put on it. Petroleum-derived compounds sitting on the scalp, especially with repeated use, is something I think is worth being thoughtful about regardless of what the current research does or doesn’t say definitively. The good news is that there are genuinely wonderful natural oils that do what mineral oil promises to do, but actually deliver. Pure Argan Oil is a real ingredient and you can buy it straightforwardly without it being buried under petroleum derivatives. Mielle Organics Rosemary Mint Scalp and Hair Strengthening Oil has become one of my most-recommended products for mature hair because it actually nourishes the scalp and supports hair growth, which is the thing everyone is actually trying to accomplish when they reach for a hot oil treatment. That’s a real result, not just a surface one.
If you want to go deep on oils specifically, jojoba oil is another one I use regularly because its molecular structure is the closest thing in nature to our own scalp sebum, which makes it exceptionally well-absorbed and non-greasy. For older hair, that compatibility matters more than it did in your thirties.
So What Does This All Mean for Your Routine?
Here’s the honest answer: you don’t need to overhaul everything at once, and you don’t need to become someone who reads every ingredient label with a magnifying glass before you’ll let a shampoo into your house. What I’d suggest is starting with the products you use most frequently and staying on your hair the longest, your shampoo, your conditioner, and any leave-in treatments or scalp serums. Those are where exposure adds up the most.
Look for the ingredients mentioned here, especially SLS, the drying alcohols, formaldehyde-releasing preservatives, heavy silicones used daily, synthetic fragrance, parabens, and mineral oil or petrolatum. And when you find them, start replacing those products gradually as you run out rather than throwing everything out at once, which is both wasteful and overwhelming.
The bigger picture is that hair care for mature women is genuinely underserved by the industry, and a lot of what’s marketed as “volumizing” or “strengthening” or “intense repair” is built around ingredients that were designed for a different hair type and a different hormonal environment. Your hair at sixty or sixty-five or seventy deserves products that were actually thought through with your scalp’s current needs in mind, not just reformulated versions of what sold well to twenty-five year olds.
Margaret, I hope this answers your question and then some. Go check those labels. You might be surprised what you find in products you’ve trusted for years, and fixing it might be a lot simpler than you think.